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Conversations in long-distance relationships are mostly through online means. Having conversations with someone who isn’t in front of you, can be challenging and sometimes confusing.
- Use conversation starter games and journals
- Keep your conversation interesting
- Play conversation games
- Discuss relationship building questions
- Discuss conversation topics
- Have casual phone conversations
- Do some texting
When you are having a conversation in a long-distance relationship, it’s good to know the reason for it. For example, you can have a conversation to discuss something in particular, to connect, or to make a plan. Conversation starter games and couples’ journals can help you keep your conversations interesting and fun.
Long-distance relationships involve romantic partners that can’t be physically together. The distance may last for a couple of weeks, a few months, or even years. During this time, long-distance partners visit each other and in between visits, the only way long-distance relationship couples maintain an emotional connection is by having regular conversations.
Long-Distance Relationship Conversation Starters
In a healthy long-distance relationship, conversations should flow by themselves. If you have to start thinking about what to say to your partner, it can be a sign that it’s time to reassess your relationship.
An exception would be starting a new long-distance relationship. It’s great if you click with someone, and your conversations flow easily. But now and then you may feel stuck. There are many reasons why you can be lost for words while having conversations with someone you just met online.
Sometimes you want to ask something, but you’re too shy or embarrassed to do it. Sometimes you may have doubts about yourself, the other person or about having a long-distance relationship.
Conversation starter games and couples journals can help you with this problem. All you have to do is suggest playing these games or going through the questions in a journal with another person.
This allows you to start conversations, learn new and important things about each other. And you don’t need to feel anxious about asking questions because all you do is follow the process.
You could start conversations by asking people how they feel. And I don’t mean “good, thanks, you”. You want to understand the emotional state of the person in front of you. You can also share your feelings if you trust this person. So, in a way, opening up with sharing your feelings can determine the level of trust that you have in your relationship.
It may take some time to feel that trust and develop a deeper connection. In the beginning, you can start with casual chitchat that will give you an idea of what the person is going through in their life at the moment.
As your relationship develops and you build trust, you should be able to open up to each other more easily. But, if after a few months you still experience barriers, then you should talk about it and how much you can and want to trust each other.
Starting a conversation with your long-distance partner should be fun and easy. You may find yourself in a situation where you need to talk about things that feel uncomfortable.
If this is the case, all you need to do is tell your partner that there are things that bother you or you aren’t sure about. Tell them you would like to share these thoughts and doubts with them to get their point of you.
To start a more serious conversation, you should create a time and the space to do it, instead of randomly calling your partner or sending them a text diving into the problems. Arrange the time where both of you could spend an hour or two talking about it, without feeling rushed.
This article takes a deep dive into all aspects of communication in a long-distance relationship.
How Do You Keep a Conversation Interesting in a Long-Distance Relationship?
If you find that your long-distance relationship conversations became boring, you should reassess your relationship. It’s not good enough to find something random and interesting to talk about.
Boring conversations in a long-distance relationship can be a sign that you are talking too much or too often. They may lead to boring relationship, which you can avoid by maintaining intimacy and keeping your relationship interesting and exciting. This workbook will help you spice up you long-distance relationship.
It can also be a sign that you are spending more time talking to your long-distance partner than having a real-life in the physical world that you live in.
To keep your conversations interesting, you should have something interesting happening in your life, so that you can share it with your long-distance partner.
If your life is boring and you’re not doing anything apart from talking to your long-distance partner, trying to find some interesting things to do or topics to talk about isn’t a solution.
Long-Distance Relationship Conversation Games
If you want to spice up your long-distance relationship, you can play different games online. You can also play games that help you feel connected and discover your relationship.
While you can find many couple’s games online, you can create your own game as well. To give you some ideas, you can use couples journals to guide you through having conversations about your long-distance relationship.
Conversations can become more interesting with both of you answering the same question and then discussing your answers.
Long-Distance Relationship Conversation Questions
There are many great discussion questions for couples in long-distance relationships. We can divide questions into broad topics. One topic is about you and your partner sharing your personal goals and achievements. When one person shares their life experience, the other partner tries to listen and understand.
If you know how to listen to your partner and understand them, you will be able to give them a healthy perspective on the situation.
A piece of helpful advice can be precious coming from the person you trust and who can also give you an unbiased opinion while having the best intentions to help you.
Another group of questions is to talk about your relationship. When you’re in a long-distance relationship, you should have a lot of discussions about how the distance affects each of you separately and your relationship as a whole.
If you keep in mind both of these groups of questions, you will never be lost for words during the conversations with your long-distance partner. You can get many conversation ideas in this article.
Long-Distance Relationship Conversation Topics
A lot of couples in a long-distance relationship struggle to find new things to talk about. It becomes a problem when you spend a lot of time talking to each other every day. You are trying to reach out and connect in an attempt to feel closer.
No amount of conversations will breach the physical distance between two people who live in different parts of the world.
In a long-distance relationship, there’s a boundary of how often you should speak to your special someone. Once you cross this boundary, your relationship becomes toxic for you and your partner.
Long-Distance Relationships Phone Conversations
Phone conversations are an easy way to keep in touch with your long-distance partner. It’s great to give them a call whenever you feel like it or if you want to share something that’s happening in your life.
Having phone conversations with your long-distance partner also has its challenges. Because it’s so easy to just dial a number and speak, it can be tempting to call them whenever you feel like it, disregarding whether or not it’s a good time for them.
When it comes to having phone conversations you should discuss the best times to call each other, so your phone calls will not become an inconvenience.
Another thing you should consider while having phone conversations is that you should keep them light. If there is something more important that you would like to discuss, try setting up a video call at a time that is convenient for both of you.
But, even video calls have their limitations as well. Sometimes you may feel that you need to express something that you struggled to find the words for.
Some conversations shouldn’t be on the phone.
If it is something personal and important that you need to talk about, consider waiting until you see each other. Long-distance relationship visits are perfect to catch up with having full conversations face-to-face. See this article for full details.
Long-Distance Text Conversation
Texting in a long-distance relationship has the same implications as phone calls. It’s very easy to get carried away texting all the time, sharing every little thing. After some time over communication can put extra pressure on your long-distance relationship.
It’s fine to send texts in long-distance relationships now and then. They don’t have to be meaningful, nor do they have to be important. Even their little cheeky message telling your long-distance partner that you’re thinking of them can mean a lot without needing a reply.
One of the common problems in long-distance relationships is that when one partner keeps texting quite a lot, and if the other partner doesn’t have the time to respond. This may seem like they don’t care and it’s easy to jump to conclusions. But doing so is very dangerous and unhealthy for your relationship.
Here is an article where we discuss texting in a long-distance relationship.
Long-Distance Relationship Skype Conversations
Having video calls through Skype or Zoom is the next best thing after talking to the person who is in front of you. In a long-distance relationship, when you can’t see each other every day physically, Video calling is a great way to catch up while seeing each other’s faces.
Video calling doesn’t replace having somebody in front of you, but it’s much better to talk to your long-distance relationship partner when you can see their face.
You can have many conversations via video calling, even the most serious ones.
Long-Distance Relationship Conversation Tips and Ideas
Here are some tips and ideas for having conversations in long-distance relationships:
- Set the time that works for both of you to have a conversation.
- Choose the most appropriate way to have the conversation based on how important is the topic you want to discuss.
- If you feel that you can’t resolve the issue through online means, wait until you see each other.
- If you are struggling to start a conversation, try to understand why.
- If your conversations get boring, try to see what has changed since when they are no longer interesting.
Effective communication is a key to make your long-distance relationship work. To help you along, here’s a workbook that will take you step by step through everything you need to know about communication in your relationship.
One thing you should keep in mind when having conversations with your long-distance partner is the way you communicate. It depends on the degree of importance and seriousness of your conversation and your discussion.
If you want to remind your partner that you love them, sending a text is fine. Phone conversations are great to catch up when you’re on the go. Video calling works well to discuss things while seeing each other’s faces.
If you find that there are issues you can’t work out via online means, you should pause these conversations until you see each other in your next visit.
If you would like to reassess your relationship and address any issues you may have to make it work, check out our complete step by step guide.
How Healthy Is Your Long-Distance Relationship?
If you are having doubts about your long-distance relationship and are not sure if you should try to fix it or let it go, here is our step by step guide to help you and your partner reassess your relationship and make an educated decision that works for both of you.
Relationship Coaching for Long-Distance Couples
Long-distance relationships are hard to maintain without knowing exactly what they involve.
However, once you understand what long-distance relationships are, what they are not and how to navigate them, you are a lot more likely to make it work.
We specialise in helping long-distance couples create and maintain a healthy relationship by building intimacy, trust and effective communication.
If you are starting a long-distance relationship or are already in one, send us a message to book an individual coaching session for yourself or a couples coaching session for you and your partner.
Frequently Asked Questions
How do you keep a conversation going in a long-distance relationship?
You can keep conversations going by sharing things that happen in your life and how you feel about them. If both of you shared everything you wanted to share, you can end your conversation and do something more interesting with your life.
How do you keep a long-distance conversation interesting?
If you are in a healthy relationship, your conversations will be interesting all the time. But wait, surely there are times when a conversation becomes dull… If you are feeling bored during a conversation, find something better to do, it’s that simple.
What do you talk about with your long-distance partner?
You can talk about your personal life, listen to what your partner wants to share or discuss your relationship, and how the long-distance affects it.
How often should you talk in a long-distance relationship?
You can talk as often as you like, as long as you set the boundaries. Set these boundaries and agree on how often and how much you talk to each other.
Should you talk every day in a long-distance relationship?
You can talk every day, but you don’t have to. You need to find a balance between how much you need to talk to feel emotionally connected and how much your partner needs it.
Is it OK to not talk to your partner every day?
It’s okay not to talk to your partner every day. But if they need to talk every day to maintain an emotional connection, you should do it. If you feel that it’s too much, you could reduce the amount of time you talk.
What questions do you ask in a long-distance relationship?
You cannot schedule questions to catch up with your long-distance partner. You can also discuss questions that are related to your long-distance relationship. This will help you stay on top of your relationship and pick up any issues that you need to resolve.