You might be starting a new long-distance relationship online or having a long-distance relationship with your existing pattern. While in a long-distance relationship, you will be visiting each other.
Visiting in a long-distance relationship will be one of the fundamental parts of keeping your relationship healthy. In a long-distance relationship, most of your communication happens via online means. While apart, you can use clear and effective communication for maintaining an emotional connection. However, a romantic relationship requires physical intimacy, so at some point you need to move in if you want to stay together.
Today I’d like to talk about the importance of visiting a long-distance partner and the things you can do between visits to stay connected.
Who Should Be Visiting in a Long-Distance Relationship?
One of the first questions that couples in long-distance relationships face is who is going to visit whom.
If you are starting a long-distance relationship online, you should visit each other as soon as you can. When you visit your long-distance partner, you get a chance to observe their environment and understand where they come from.
When your long-distance partner visits you, they will get a better understanding of your environment and circumstances. Having this understanding of where both of you come from will help you find a way to create a healthy relationship.
When you are in a long-distance relationship with an existing partner, you already know how much physical closeness you need to feel connected.
Depending on your circumstances, one of you may be living at home. At the same time, another has to travel and be away from work or study. It can be fun to alternate your visits at home with visiting your partner in a different location and have a holiday together.
How Often Should Long-Distance Couples Visit One Another?
In a new long-distance relationship, you will probably spend a couple of months to get to know each other. At some point, you will need to meet each other for the first time to see what it’s like being together.
The frequency of your subsequent visit depends on how serious your long-distance relationship is and how quickly it develops.
Suppose you are in a long-distance relationship with an existing partner. In that case, you should agree on how often you want and how often you’ll be able to visit each other. For your long-distance relationship to work, you should also agree how long the long-distance will last and if you’re okay with it.
Have a look at this article to learn the steps to make your long-distance relationship work.
If you have the means to visit each other as often as you’d like, then your long-distance relationship can work just fine. However, many couples don’t have the luxury of visiting each other as often as they want. This raises the question of whether or not your relationship can survive the long-distance.
When you are in a romantic relationship, you expect physical intimacy. In a long-distance relationship, physical intimacy can become a problem.
Suppose your long-distance relationship lasts indefinitely or you are unable to visit each other as often as you’d like. In that case, it will be tough to have a successful long-distance relationship. Click here to learn what it takes to have a successful long-distance relationship.
Every couple and every person has their preferences as to how often they would like and need physical intimacy. Even in the same couple, each partner may have different needs for physical intimacy.
There isn’t a universal number for how often you should visit each other in a long-distance relationship. But you and your partner must agree on how often you can visit each other and at which point you would feel deprived.
Here is a step by step guide to improve intimacy in your long-distance relationship.
How to Spend the Time Between Visits in a Long-Distance Relationship?
It would be best if you didn’t leave too much time between visits. The danger of not visiting your long-distance partner frequently enough is that you may grow apart.
Naturally, one’s feelings change all the time. Suppose you are in a long-distance relationship for a long time and you are not visiting each other often enough. In that case, you may lose the connection between each other.
Being apart from your romantic partner for a long time isn’t healthy.
Suppose you have no control over your circumstances. In that case, you may consider an open long-distance relationship or have a break from your relationship or convert your romantic relationship into a friendship.
To make the most of your time together and to maintain a healthy relationship between your visits, use this workbook a guide.
What to Do When Your Long-Distance Partner Coming to Visit
When your long-distance partner is coming to visit, it can be exhilarating.
You can spend the time between a visit to plan everything you need to talk about and the things you’d like to do when you visit each other.
For a long-distance relationship to be successful is a good idea to have a plan of when and whom will be visiting. Since planning is such a big part of your visits, we have created this step by step guide to help you with that.
To keep the long-distance relationship exciting, you can spend your visit going on holidays and having different trips together.
You might also enjoy staying at home together, relax and talk about things that matter to you. Visit in a long-distance relationship is a perfect opportunity to talk about things that you can’t discuss over the Internet.
First Visit in a Long-Distance Relationship
After you got to know each other well enough online, it’s time for your first visit. Who visits first, is in most cases, a matter of convenience.
Many couples choose to have their first visit in a neutral place.
The next visit if you get on well with each other, you’d probably spend visiting each other to get to know where each of you come from.
Are You Feeling Nervous About Seeing Your Long-Distance Partner?
Seeing someone, you met online for the first time can be very nervous. It’s normal to feel nervous when you meet someone you haven’t met before.
A part of you thinks that you know that person because you spent a few months talking to them. But the other part of you realises that you’ve never actually met them in real life and you don’t know what to expect.
If you are in the long-distance relationship with your existing partner, you may have spent quite a long time apart. Seeing each other again can also be a nervous experience. When you are apart from your partner, your relationship can change.
Knowing how to handle the distance can make or brake your relationship. To help you out, we have created this step by step guide.
The more time you spend apart, the more both you and your partner engage with your own lives. So when you meet, both of you may have changed a little bit. And in a way, it may feel like meeting someone new.
If you understand this possibility of change, you can prepare for it. Suppose you expect getting back to your relationship the way it was before. In that case, You may feel disappointed if it doesn’t happen.
With that in mind, try to be open and honest with your partner and take things as they come. If something doesn’t feel right, just share it with your partner and together you can decide the way forward.
After Visiting in a Long-Distance Relationship
If you’re in the long-distance relationship not by choice, the time after the visit can be quite hard.
If you want to be together with your partner, but long-distance keep you apart. It’s normal to feel sad and depressed after your visit.
The one thing you can do is to change your focus from the things you can’t control for the ones you can. Any negative thought in a long-distance relationship can very quickly become a problem. This problem, in turn, can strain your relationship and makes it a lot harder for you to manage your long-distance relationship for the time that you have to be apart.
The best way is to find reasons why it’s so good to visit each other as well as why it’s great to be apart.
Long-distance relationships have a lot of benefits. While you are away from your romantic partner, you get a chance to spend a lot of time on your own life. You can do the things that you like with people you want, whenever you like.
Many people in long-distance relationships impose suffering on to themselves.
They wish they would be together, even though they realise that that might be difficult. They try to spend a lot of time on the phone or text messaging, which can lead to a problem of excessive communication.
When you visit your long-distance partner, enjoy your time together. And when you leave them enjoy the time you have for yourself. Learning to navigate your feelings, needs and communication is key to a healthy and successful long-distance relationship.
What to Do if a Long-Distance Partner Doesn’t Visit?
Sometimes things come up, and one of you may have to cancel the trip. When you expect and plan your visit, it can be a downer having to postpone it.
If your long-distance partner cancels the trip, they might have a valid reason for doing so. It is also possible that they cancel the trip because they don’t feel like coming to see you. This can be a sign that your long-distance relationship isn’t working very well.
Sometimes things come up, and one of you have to cancel the trip. When you expect and plan your visit, it can be disappointing if you have to postpone it.
If this happens, the best thing you can do is talk to your long-distance partner to understand why they cancel the trip. If you find that they keep cancelling more trips to visit you, this can be a red flag. It can be challenging to say when cancelling the trip is a reason or an excuse.
This is one of the occasions where your decisions rely on the trust you have built with the other person. Trust is a pilar for a healthy relationship, so it is worth taking the time to address any issues and concerns you may have in this area of your relationship. You can use this workbook to give you a guidance on bringing up and resolving the trust issues.
Surprise Visit Ideas for a Long-Distance Relationship
Surprise visits in a long-distance relationship can be a great way to spice things up. Unless your long-distance partner is cheating on you, in which case it can be awkward.
A romantic idea for a surprise visit is sending your long-distance partner a love letter. You can attach plane tickets to your letter for the dates that you know your partner is available.
To keep this surprise going, you can give them step-by-step instructions on what they have to do.
For example, when they receive a letter, all they get are the plane tickets. When they arrive at the airport, you can tell them to go to a specific locker to pick up the next clue.
You can make it as elaborate or as simple as you like. How adventurous you make your surprise visit depends on your dynamic as a couple and what both of you enjoy doing.
For more ideas and guidance on how you can spice up your long-distance relationship, take a look at this workbook.
Visiting Tips for a Long-Distance Relationship
Here are some tips for visiting in a long-distance relationship:
- You can plan your visit and make a surprise visit now and then.
- If you are in the long-distance relationship with an existing partner, try to visit each other regularly, to maintain a physical connection.
- Suppose you are starting a long-distance relationship online. In that case, you should visit each other often enough to get an idea of what it’s like being together.
Visiting Advice for a Long-Distance Relationship
The most crucial advice for visiting in a long-distance relationship is that you should visit each other regularly to maintain physical closeness. You can learn about intimacy by clicking here.
Suppose you have to maintain a long-distance relationship for a while. In that case, regular visits will help you feel that your relationship is real.
If you go for a long time without visiting each other, you may grow apart, or your feelings may change. You may also find someone else nearby to be romantically involved with.
Visiting each other in a long-distance relationship is an essential part to maintain physical and emotional intimacy.
While you are apart, you can maintain connection by keeping in touch through online means. But without having a regular visit, a romantic relationship may not work well for more extended periods.
How Healthy Is Your Long-Distance Relationship?
If you are having doubts about your long-distance relationship and are not sure if you should try to fix it or let it go, here is our step by step guide to help you and your partner reassess your relationship and make an educated decision that works for both of you.
Relationship Coaching for Long-Distance Couples
Long-distance relationships are hard to maintain without knowing exactly what they involve.
However, once you understand what long-distance relationships are, what they are not and how to navigate them, you are a lot more likely to make it work.
We specialise in helping long-distance couples create and maintain a healthy relationship by building intimacy, trust and effective communication.
If you are starting a long-distance relationship or are already in one, send us a message to book an individual coaching session for yourself or a couples coaching session for you and your partner.
Coaching Session – 60 minutes$120.00
Frequently Asked Questions
What to do when your long-distance partner visits?
When your long-distance partner visits you, you can do something fun and exciting, or you can have a relaxing time together.
How often should I visit my partner in college?
Long-distance relationships in college can be a bit tricky. You should make sure that it’s that both of you want. And if that’s the case, try visiting each other at least every two weeks.
What to do if a long-distance partner doesn’t visit me?
Talk to your long-distance partner to find out why they don’t visit you. They might have a good reason like being busy or not having the money. It’s also possible that they don’t want to see you. Either way, you have to know what’s going on.